Graceful Grief: Angelic Help is on the Way!

I believe that major change and loss in our lives is a door to grow ourselves, to become more loving, compassionate and accepting towards others and ourselves. We have choices that determine what the journey will look like.

Change isn't easy and it can be quite painful. About twenty years ago, I endured the loss of a parent, a sister and a terrifying sexual assault within a two-year span. More recently, I experienced a car accident, loss of another parent, and the death of my marriage within a year's time.

During the first trio of losses, I didn't have a good map for my journey. I made some positive choices, yet I also did a lot of kicking and screaming. More recently, I chose another route. I didn't resist the change and the pain. Instead, I embraced it as a gift for transformation.

As a grief therapist, I've watched the conscious and unconscious choices my clients make. I saw that change was made more painful through resistance and running from feelings. I saw that one's thoughts about change and belief in one's ability to change gracefully were key components. If I believe the journey is going to be horrible, it will be. If I believe that I can go through the experience with more ease, less suffering and grow my soul incredibly as a result, then that's what will happen.

I also saw that these painful moments in our lives are sacred and are blessed by the presence of spiritual helpers.

Now consider this. I believe that every time we are faced with a major life challenge:

* That we are surrounded by our own band of angels, spirit guides and departed loved ones who become part of our 'team' to deal with this challenge, and to help us transform to the next 'level'.

* That these spiritual helpers are 'feeding' us thoughts, ideas and perceptions that will assist us to heal and transform, especially if we have given them the 'ok.'

* That there is incredible ENERGY that accompanies each of these life events that is available to us to PROPEL us forward into becoming more fully who we were meant to be.

* That by consciously choosing to use our spiritual help and this amazing energy and creative Life Force that comes with loss and challenges, we join the ranks of a growing collective of inspired and inspiring souls who are healing themselves and the planet.

* That we need never suffer again in the same way as we face one of these challenges because each of us is a co-creator and harnesser of this powerful team of transformers.

* That we can actually EMBRACE CHANGE and move into changes with confidence and with tools to stay focused on positive transformation; we can then pass on our knowledge to friends and family to improve their lives too.

Yet we have to be mindful and awake. We can all transform 'unconsciously.' It's a little like sleep-walking. We just let ourselves be at the mercy of the energy and hope for the best. And though I truly believe that each person is going through their life challenges exactly the way they're supposed to, I also believe we are given messages of hope for something more meaningful, something that can align us more with a life of more ease, vitality, and joy. I am grateful to my clients and to myself for showing me the possibilities and the power of believing change is a gift. And I know, with great peace, that I am surrounded by loving spiritual beings, and I can choose to transform by grace. It's a much better ride, I must admit.

Marcia Breitenbach is a therapist and presenter, and has written 2 books and made 4 CD's of original music having to do with change, grief and transformation.

Visit her at

In The News:

Parental grief at loss of child
Stabroek News
“Parental grief is different from other losses—it is intensified, exaggerated and lengthened…. The loss of a child is the loss of innocence, the death of the most vulnerable and dependent. The death of a child signifies the loss of the future, of ...

Hospice program on grief slated for Saturday
New Bern Sun Journal
Dealing with grief associated with significant loss from death or separation takes a toll on survivors, often without their knowing how to cope. Craven County Hospice, in association with the Hospice Foundation of America, will be presenting a one-hour ...

Toronto Star

United in grief: mourning the loss of Cpl. Nathan Cirillo
Toronto Star
Holding her seven-week-old daughter, Katrina Shand started to cry before the funeral procession for Cpl. Nathan Cirillo began. “It hits close to home,” Shand said, wiping away tears. Her boyfriend is in the military and has friends in the Argyll and ...

Deseret News

Book review: Mother writes about living onward from death and grief in 'On ...
Deseret News
“On Loss and Living Onward” is a compilation of prose, poetry and hope for those who are grieving or who have grieved. It also serves as a guide for those helping loved ones through a grieving experience. Each chapter is filled with voices, both past ...

Grief will fade for Nathan Cirillo's son but not his loss: DiManno
A nation that yearned to embrace the child, too, and assume some of the burden of loss, if that were only possible. But nobody can truly do that for the grieving. And the day after, all the many days after, this tragedy will recede for the public, just ...
The loss of Cpl. Nathan Cirillo drew people of Hamilton
Mourning the loss of Cpl. Nathan CirilloMetroNews Canada
'We are better for his life and we are diminished by his loss'
all 2,566 news articles »

Nov. 10: Grief and Loss: Getting through the Holiday Season
Bayuk has worked with loss and grief in her own life and professionally as a nurse and psychotherapist. She has been a Psychosocial Nurse Specialist for 40 years and a nurse for 45 years. A new Grief Support group will be offered beginning February 17, ...

SPCA of Northern Nevada to offer last free monthly pet loss grief class of 2014
KRNV My News 4
These classes will focus on one to two topics each month about pet loss and will be moderated by Steve Woods, owner of A Beloved Friends Pet Crematory, and Rev. Stephen Arvin, local Public Safety Chaplain. The SPCA is located at 4950 Spectrum Blvd in ...

and more »

Marshfield News-Herald

Easing the Burden: Frequently asked questions about grief
Marshfield News-Herald
In most cases, the pain associated with grieving begins to subside considerably in the second and third years following loss. This means that there are more good days than bad ones; that the heavy, depressive feelings in earlier months begin to break ...

and more » (blog)

Sharing Responsibly: Grief, Loss and Social Media (blog)
Sharing Responsibly: Grief, Loss and Social Media A lot of folks these days are talking about unplugging from social media. Maybe not permanently, but for a period of time in order to have face-to-face connections with people again. But what if not ...

News from Rutgers

Course on 'Grief and Loss Across the Lifespan' Broadens Students Assumptions
News from Rutgers
Grief and loss sound like experiences that would impact senior citizens more than the fresh-faced Master of Social Work students who are enrolled in, “Grief and Loss Across the Lifespan.” Yet each year, students in this class, which is required for the ...

Google News

Grief Support: The Dos

Helpers often ask questions such as: "What should I do?... Read More

How to Cope with Anticipatory Grief

Anticipatory grief is the name given to the mix of... Read More

Am I a Mother - Tips for Handling Mother?s Day After Miscarriage

Are you spending this Mother's Day wondering if you are,... Read More

An Unexpected Letter

It was a couple of weeks after Christmas, and I... Read More

Anticipatory Grief and Ongoing Sadness for Caregivers

In 1969, Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross published her famous book; On... Read More

How to Deal with Suffering

Reflect upon the following questions, and answer those you feel... Read More

GoodBye GrandMa

My dearest Grandma, I will never forget you & sorry... Read More

Death, Close and Personal

I got an email recently from someone whose mother died.... Read More

The Creative Side of Healing

One of the areas where I seem to be placing... Read More

Silent Tears - from a Norwegian Hospital

Silent tears hit hospital-white sheets. The young Pakistani mother holds... Read More

You Have to Show Up: On Small Miracles (Okay, maybe not so small)

I hadn't intended to go to my cousin's funeral.That sounds... Read More

Learning to Live Again

Overcoming death and beginning once again to live is the... Read More

The Truth About Emotional Intelligence

There is so much emphasis on emotional intelligence these days... Read More

Adapting to the Loss of a Loved One: Three Tips on how to Cope

Have you ever sat down and played a piano where... Read More

Suicide in the Church Part 1

Recently, several suicides have occurred right here in my own... Read More

Dying On the Inside: A Childs Grief

The impatient tooting of a car horn startled us into... Read More

Euthanasia: How Will I Know When its Time?

Pippin needed assistance from his owner to get to his... Read More

Good Grief!

If tears are an indication of how special my relationship... Read More

Afraid Of Dying? Afraid Of Living!

Over the years, I've heard many people voice their concerns... Read More

Suicide Survivor

Suicide is a nightmare for survivors of loved ones. Death... Read More

How Long Does It Take to Mend a Broken Heart?

Julian Austin, Canadian country singer, released a song called Should... Read More

Dealing With Grief and Loss - How to Mend a Broken Heart

What is it about Grief & Loss that upsets us... Read More

Whens Sarah Coming Home? Helping Your Child Understand Death

For most children, their first experience with grief comes with... Read More

How to Deal With A Death in the Family and Still Run Your Small Business

As a small business owner we have to deal with... Read More

Why Dont We Talk About Anticipatory Grief?

I know anticipatory grief - a feeling of loss before... Read More